life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this disease, open heart surgery that was less than successful and more recently an S-ICD (internal cardiac defibrillator) implanted in my chest that will hopefully restore my heart beat in case of sudden cardiac death. I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to learn how to live a full life with heart failure, to honor my creativity, and to explore all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say
"Don't talk like that!"


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Wednesday, June 22, 2016

....Repeat after me....this fear is worth it....this fear is worth it....

The hours before I begin a new class are horrible!  I always worry about how it is going to go….do I really know what I am doing?....will they like me or just think I am a LooneyTune?  As I gather up my courage again, I whisper this mantra under my breath.....A LOT!  “This fear is worth it….This fear is worth it!  This is what I am meant to do, it is why I am here.  I am human, I am going to screw up and be wrong, I am not now nor was I ever made to be perfect.   I am an artist….screwing up and making something wonderful from the mess is a part of my creative process!” The courage to let the world see my imperfections and vulnerabilities does not make me weak and broken, it makes me strong!

"Song for a Friend"  Jason Mraz

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