life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this disease, open heart surgery that was less than successful and more recently an S-ICD (internal cardiac defibrillator) implanted in my chest that will hopefully restore my heart beat in case of sudden cardiac death. I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to learn how to live a full life with heart failure, to honor my creativity, and to explore all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say
"Don't talk like that!"


Music is loading really slow lately...sorry...

Wednesday, June 22, 2016

....Repeat after me....this fear is worth it....this fear is worth it....

The hours before I begin a new class are horrible!  I always worry about how it is going to go….do I really know what I am doing?....will they like me or just think I am a LooneyTune?  As I gather up my courage again, I whisper this mantra under my breath.....A LOT!  “This fear is worth it….This fear is worth it!  This is what I am meant to do, it is why I am here.  I am human, I am going to screw up and be wrong, I am not now nor was I ever made to be perfect.   I am an artist….screwing up and making something wonderful from the mess is a part of my creative process!” The courage to let the world see my imperfections and vulnerabilities does not make me weak and broken, it makes me strong!

"Song for a Friend"  Jason Mraz

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