life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....

I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this raunchy disease. My words always help me understand that in this life there will be times that are crappy painful and unexpected but tucked in there are the amazingly wonderful, too. That is when I realized the only control I have over any of this is how I chose to experience them! I realized that I could understand, celebrate can survive even better when I could express these feelings with my own words of courage, humor, and grace. I am the Queen of my own life and the choice is mine!

I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure.

I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"



Tuesday, June 7, 2016

No more time to waste....

I have spent the last few years of my life being reminded that I should just wait.  Wait on others to define my goodness, my health, and my love.  All had to be validated by someone else first, to be “real”.   I was taught I had to have the patience for them to decide, decipher tests, or just simply have the time when they were not too busy for me, if I was worth it.  Waiting was an admirable virtue.  I allowed that.  I recognized early on that anything, from anybody is better than nothing at all.  So I learned how to wait. I let it go way beyond simple and necessary sharing and taking turns and it became about earning others approval so I might be good enough to be first. I am not blaming anyone but me, I allowed this!  But…life is happening now I do not have any more time to wait or waste!

"You Get What You Give"  New Radicals
You've got the music in you,  Don't let go
You've got the music in you,  One dance left
This world is gonna pull through,   Don't give up
You've got a reason to live, Can't forget, We only get what we give

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