life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure. I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"


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Friday, November 17, 2023

 


There are times we all see people who are rude and it is just a hair short of being full-blown bullies and...this is an assisted living space for seniors! Not everyone is perfect and this more than anything describes some of the residents who never appreciate all that is being done for them.  Some should really quit being so intolerant of others and take a good hard look at themselves! 

Thursday, November 9, 2023

This was NOT where I would have ever fought to stay

  


First of all, I need to make it perfectly clear...THIS IS NOT where I have ever wanted to be.  I have spent 7 months in a medical memory care unit (parts of my brain did not get enough O2 and my whole brain went on strike, shutting down pieces and parts that are rather necessary for a somewhat normal life. I never fought to stay in that place, I fought to get out.  Unfortunately with limitted capacity this was more difficult than I could have ever imagined.  But, I did continue listening to my soul when my brain failed me so comepletely and thank goodness it continued to sing "it is time for me to move on". As my brain began to heal with more O2 and meds it was easier for me to realize I could not trust my brain but I could still  hear my soul. It was time to gather up my lessons and let my heart and soul begin to take me where I belong.

I am now living in an assisted living facility in my own apartment with access to the medical attention I need but the freedom to live a life with some long missed freedoms!  I know now that this is where I belong, It is time for me to walk back into the creative parts of my life.  Those are the parts that define who I am!

"I Think I See the Light" Yosuff / Cat Stevens



Wednesday, November 8, 2023

This is a difficult admission.  I still have no idea what I am made of and I cannot even tell you that at the height of my brokenness, I had no idea I was anything less than fine.  It was the rest of the world that was upside down.  It was my family that was able to recognize the brokenness.  That must have been difficult because my normal is a bit left of center.  It must have been "holy crap" broken for them to realize it.

Broken but now life is being glued back together.  It will not be the same as before.  I hope it is better.

"Breaking Silence" Janis Ian

https://od.lk/f/Ml83Mzc4OTg2NF8