life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure. I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"


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Sunday, March 15, 2020

My truth needs space...


I come from a very “appropriate” background…you may define “appropriate” in a thousand different ways that may shock some!  But in this case, it is about appropriate behavior while grieving.  It had been well defined by my experiences in earlier life of family and friends.  The best word I can think of is “stoic”.  We were taught to cover our own feelings, no crying in pubic, and no matter what was said you nod your head, smile graciously and say thank you.  Then it is all over in a couple of weeks and life goes back to normal…WRONG…

“Our cultural history of pretending that grief is no big deal, of not allowing grief to take up space or have a voice has actually caused a lot of our epidemics of depression, anxiety, drug addiction, interpersonal violence, and other challenges. That's what happens when you don't allow your emotional reality to take up the space it needs. That's what happens when you don't allow the truth to have space to exist. It's not that your pain goes away, it finds other ways to speak. Wherever you are in your grief, whatever path you’re currently on: write. Write to give your future self a portal back to here. Write to give yourself an anchor to your heart. ~ Megan Devine

Learning how to grieve seems ridiculous, but believe me, it takes a set of skills that I did not have.  I am still working on it...I am a slow learner!

"Story of Your Life"  Mathew West

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