life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this disease, open heart surgery that was less than successful and more recently an S-ICD (internal cardiac defibrillator) implanted in my chest that will hopefully restore my heart beat in case of sudden cardiac death. I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to learn how to live a full life with heart failure, to honor my creativity, and to explore all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say
"Don't talk like that!"


Music is loading really slow lately...sorry...

Sunday, November 20, 2016

being uncommon...

It kind of feels like, that most attempts to make me feel common….for example religion, politics, social/business associations and most medical offices appeal to my need to be well, part of a tribe, to be liked by others, or to “fit in” socially.  But when I stand back and honestly compare my needs with “their” needs…. there always seems to be an underlying reason for them to want me to fit in and it never has anything to do with what is good for me.  My need to be a part of something, my need to be loved and liked and my need to be well has given them access to my inherent weakness for them to exploit and take control of how I feel about myself.  Need is the four letter word that destroys me. I want to feel good about being uncommon!
"32 Flavors"  Ani DiFranco

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