life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....

I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this raunchy disease. My words always help me understand that in this life there will be times that are crappy painful and unexpected but tucked in there are the amazingly wonderful, too. That is when I realized the only control I have over any of this is how I chose to experience them! I realized that I could understand, celebrate can survive even better when I could express these feelings with my own words of courage, humor, and grace. I am the Queen of my own life and the choice is mine!

I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure.

I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"


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Tuesday, August 9, 2016

There won’t be any gifts or parties, but I will be celebrating!

This Saturday will be my 1 year anniversary.  Most likely, I am the only one that will even remember.   1 year ago I underwent some pretty risky open heart surgery to re-vascularize “hibernating” cardiac tissue.  It was one of the hardest thing I have ever done, It was an incredible disappointing failure of the procedure (the hibernating tissue did not “wake up” and My EF is still dances in the 25% range) I suffered from a post op TIA and kidney failure and even more surgery as soon as this healed.   It was a rough couple of weeks months, year!   But I am still here, still living, still creating, still teaching, still laughing, still loving  and I bought myself and my heart a gift to celebrate.  I commissioned the most magnificent jewelry artist to create this for me and it was delivered today.  Made of 3 different metals that represent my mind, body and spirit, the 4 big pieces of my life, my family and the rest is pretty evident and tells my story better than a thousand words.  I am proud…I survived…I am moving forward!

"How Can You Mend an Open Heart"  Al Green & Joss Stone

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