life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....

I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this raunchy disease. My words always help me understand that in this life there will be times that are crappy painful and unexpected but tucked in there are the amazingly wonderful, too. That is when I realized the only control I have over any of this is how I chose to experience them! I realized that I could understand, celebrate can survive even better when I could express these feelings with my own words of courage, humor, and grace. I am the Queen of my own life and the choice is mine!

I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure.

I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"



Tuesday, August 30, 2016


My 2016 year of Artist’s Way classes are over with a mixed feeling of joy and relief, but most endings are like that.  I always learn more than I teach in these classes, and that is one of the huge reasons I keep coming back year after year.  This summer group came up with a term that has resonated with me. She (and she knows who she is) calls it re-framing.  

As an old picture framer even the word, re-framing appeals to me.  Re-framing appears to have its roots in gratitude, but is not the same.  Re-framing is taking a situation that may be difficult and looking at it from a different point of view (as opposed to my ingrained typical point of view) before reacting.  It also opens up the possibility of acknowledging grief and anger unlike gratitude. Sometimes I just need to be hurt, and grieve, sometimes I feel like I am so full of emotional scar tissue I am running out of the ability to be empathetic with others and myself. 

This week,  I have officially rejected the newest round of old tests that they use to determine how much more heart function I have lost.  I am re-framing my health, re-framing my life.
"From Me to You"  Janis Ian

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