life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure. I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"


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Thursday, July 11, 2019

I am important, I matter, too


I understand that most people may not “get” this, but my life is full of sound reasoning supporting it.  As an artist, framer, small business owner I spent a significant part of my life “marketing” …vying for your attention and dollars.  Marketing is the business acceptable code word for begging for your attention.  I paid professional PR companies to do it for me, I paid to be judged to get my work in art festivals, I paid (consignment) to be in galleries, I paid for logo designs and websites for classes I taught.  I have spent a lifetime “chasing” people with my money and time to like me. I smiled, agreed, shook hands, laughed at horrible jokes, diplomatically tiptoed around every inflammatory issue so I would not offend anyone. It is not surprising that some of those habits/or aversion to those habits spilled into my personal life over the years.

My life has been about getting people to like me and my work, it did not matter what I thought about myself.  So now this late in my life, I am finally learning that I cannot make anyone like or love me…I am just now figuring out that I am important, I matter, too.

"Breaking Silence" Janis Ian

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