life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this disease, open heart surgery that was less than successful and more recently an S-ICD (internal cardiac defibrillator) implanted in my chest that will hopefully restore my heart beat in case of sudden cardiac death. I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to learn how to live a full life with heart failure, to honor my creativity, and to explore all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say
"Don't talk like that!"


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Music is loading really slow lately...sorry...

Sunday, April 15, 2018

I Get Stronger....

There are so many things I wish I had done so much better!  I wish I had not cared about what people thought about me a long long time ago!  There would have been fewer days of beating myself up for not being good enough. But perhaps that was the re-direction that put me on the precise path I needed to be on. I am gaining the strength to not care about what others think now.  I have the courage to do whatever makes my heart sing (when this body allows).  I no longer care if it is right or wrong according to others…  all I need to feel is the right or wrong in my own heart and I cause no pain to myself or others.  For right now….I do not expect anyone to agree, nor do I ask anyone to.  Now I know,  I was never really rejected, it is part of my journey to learn the right and wrong of my own heart and as bizarre as it may sound to most…as my body fails….I get stronger!
"This is Me"  Kesha

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