Today (and perhaps for a while) I may have to really really tune into my need to create. I may need to figure out how to create a new life without the support of my hospice team. The amazing group of people that have watched over me weekly. The new insurance company is questioning my need, citing my lack of hospital admissions in the past year as being proof of being beyond their hospice criteria. WHAT???? This is where I would like to point out the outrageous flaw in this benchmark for hospice care! Without hospice…mostly what I have is palliative care is exactly what has kept me out of the hospital…and I do hate hospitals! Anyway, I have already cried, screamed punched my pillow. But the reality is I can waste my time trying to fix or convince a company that has absolutely no interest in my health only in their financial obligations to the stockholders. I may need to step up to the plate, get really creative and spend this energy I am wasting on being frightened and angry to open my heart and mind to figure out how to figure out how to move forward with my life. It is not always fun…but I had no idea just how hard it was going to get. The lesson has been…. there is nothing about the business of death that is any different from any other business. And the bottom line is my money vs. their money. Life has nothing to do with it! I am the only one that can create the life I love, and I cannot allow them to take it away from me....but I have to admit I am feeling overwhelmed!
"Look What You've Done" Bread
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