life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this disease, open heart surgery that was less than successful and more recently an S-ICD (internal cardiac defibrillator) implanted in my chest that will hopefully restore my heart beat in case of sudden cardiac death. I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to learn how to live a full life with heart failure, to honor my creativity, and to explore all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say
"Don't talk like that!"


Music is loading really slow lately...sorry...

Friday, September 30, 2016

if I am really lucky...

If I am really lucky, maybe someone in my life time will understand who, what or why I am.  But if not,  I need to learn how to be strong enough to be ok with myself  and move forward anyway.  In the past my entire life and every decision was made with the purpose of being liked and by making others happy.  It was not always good for me.  I do not want to feel or sound selfish, but I may be running out of time, and I need to figure this out.  I might be wrong, I might end up being a giant failure, but I have to find out.

"Another Train"  The Poozies

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