life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this disease, open heart surgery that was less than successful and more recently an S-ICD (internal cardiac defibrillator) implanted in my chest that will hopefully restore my heart beat in case of sudden cardiac death. I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to learn how to live a full life with heart failure, to honor my creativity, and to explore all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say
"Don't talk like that!"


Music is loading really slow lately...sorry...

Saturday, June 27, 2015


Got my butt up and out of the house, and not to a damn doctor’s appointment, the pharmacy,  the gym, or the grocery store, etc. etc. etc.  But out and over to see some amazing creative friends that I have missed dearly.  Up a flight of stairs….(a one nitro trip), several glasses of wine, laughing, hours of raging, unforgivable, but oh so much fun gossip and I really do think I can do the impossible!  Forgive me, for being afraid to let you see my fear and failures,  for last night and ahead of time for all of the mistakes I am going to make in the future as I wade hip deep through this part of my life.  I know now that I am going to be making a whole bunch more mammoth mistakes as I do the impossible,  Thanks guys,  I so need this!  You always inspire me!

"Nobody Ever Told You"  Carrie Underwood

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