life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....

I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this raunchy disease. My words always help me understand that in this life there will be times that are crappy painful and unexpected but tucked in there are the amazingly wonderful, too. That is when I realized the only control I have over any of this is how I chose to experience them! I realized that I could understand, celebrate can survive even better when I could express these feelings with my own words of courage, humor, and grace. I am the Queen of my own life and the choice is mine!

I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure.

I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"


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Monday, June 8, 2015

I am on it!

After a long time….and I am way to embarrassed to say how long, I headed back to the gym this morning  (Planet Fitness) and I am holding them to this “judgment free” thing!  The new med cocktail and assorted other tweeks and I am feeling better than I have in a while, but with the new cocktail, also comes the heinous side effects. For me the trade off is...less pain, more energy but miserable debilitating depression. Exercise is the only thing that helps, (unless I want to do more meds...WRONG!) but OMG it is so hard to get started again. A week ago I began with walking, now adding strength training at the gym and I am feeling so much better.  I will be ready to sing through the ICD implant surgery and recovery! My best medicine is coaxing those elusive endorphins into my system with exercise and movement.  It is my best solution..I am on it!
"Morning Girl"   Neon Philharmonic          

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