life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....

I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this raunchy disease. My words always help me understand that in this life there will be times that are crappy painful and unexpected but tucked in there are the amazingly wonderful, too. That is when I realized the only control I have over any of this is how I chose to experience them! I realized that I could understand, celebrate can survive even better when I could express these feelings with my own words of courage, humor, and grace. I am the Queen of my own life and the choice is mine!

I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure.

I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"



Sunday, July 30, 2017

I am enough!

I love manifestos!  They make me feel so empowered, militant and fierce!  I have a life full of things I am proud of but they are dotted with stupendous bouts of beating myself up.  It maybe one of the things that I do best…I am an expert!  This unique talent started way before I got sick, but I have gotten even better since, after all, I have a whole new set of circumstances to blame myself for.  It always begins with “Damn it, if I had only_______(fill in the blank).”  I still wrestle with self-worth and I was sure by this age I would have whipped that.  I wonder if anyone ever really gets past that.  So for right now…and for all of the “right nows” I get…I have to remember that I am enough....right now.
"Hammer & Nails"  Indigo Girls

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