life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings
Don't Talk Like That...
I write to find out what my heart thinks.... I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this disease, open heart surgery that was less than successful and more recently an S-ICD (internal cardiac defibrillator) implanted in my chest that will hopefully restore my heart beat in case of sudden cardiac death. I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to learn how to live a full life with heart failure, to honor my creativity, and to explore all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say "Don't talk like that!"
Music is loading really slow lately...sorry...
Monday, December 26, 2016
i am getting closer....
Looking over the past few years, I suspect most of my
frustration came from not being responsible for the quality of my life. But…here is where things kind of got screwed
up…I think. When you do what everyone
says you should do, follow the advice of all of the professionals, I should get
better and feel better. I remember a
time where I waited for test results to determine how I felt. Giving away all of my power to people I did
not know and a set of numbers on a piece of paper. It is a difficult balance to figure out and
practice. I am getting closer!
"Heal the Pain" George Micheal
(honoring the life of George Micheal, his music. Loosing life Christmas Day, to heart failure)