life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this disease, open heart surgery that was less than successful and more recently an S-ICD (internal cardiac defibrillator) implanted in my chest that will hopefully restore my heart beat in case of sudden cardiac death. I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to learn how to live a full life with heart failure, to honor my creativity, and to explore all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say
"Don't talk like that!"


Music is loading really slow lately...sorry...

Wednesday, December 7, 2016

Dancing and taking my power back!

Taking my power back....without permission!!! Well that is not entirely true…seemed like I needed about 42 other people’s permission, well that is not entirely  true either…but it sure did feel like it!  There was a late afternoon call from my regular docs office asking if I could come in as see them the next morning….I know….I know….when is the last time that happened….NEVER!  I figured if ever there was a sign from the Universe….this was it…I mean a doctor calling me for an appointment!  To make a long story short they are working with hospice to provide palliative care for me.  My heart has been singing, there have been tears of joy and I feel like for the first time in years, that I am being heard, that what I want matters, I finally have some control of my life….OMG it feels so good to take back my power over this disease, this heart, my life!  I am thrilled, there could be no better x-mas gift!  And I am happy dancing!!  Yes!
"Pata-Pata" Miriam Makeba

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