life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....

I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this raunchy disease. My words always help me understand that in this life there will be times that are crappy painful and unexpected but tucked in there are the amazingly wonderful, too. That is when I realized the only control I have over any of this is how I chose to experience them! I realized that I could understand, celebrate can survive even better when I could express these feelings with my own words of courage, humor, and grace. I am the Queen of my own life and the choice is mine!

I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure.

I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"


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Friday, April 25, 2014

Happy, it is my responsibility and I am OK with that...

When moving forward seems impossible, sometimes the only choice may be to look back and try to remember the happy.
somewhere in 80's, somewhere in the Virgin Islands, there was happy
I need to remind myself that there are times when there was lots of happiness, but I also need to remind myself every day, NOT to ever again put my happiness in the hands of someone else regardless of how much love there is.
If I am the only one responsible for my own happiness, then no one can take it from me. If I give someone else the power of making me happy, I also give them the power of taking it from me, making me sad and miserable. It has taken me a long time but I am learning the hard way. I am the only one that has control of making me happy. It does not matter how much time or love or history there is, I cannot risk ever trusting anyone else with my happiness.

This is my responsibility; no one else can do it for me.  My happy will never ever again come from someone else, it only comes from me.  I am ok with that.

"Let it be Me"     The Indigo Girls

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