life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....

I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this raunchy disease. My words always help me understand that in this life there will be times that are crappy painful and unexpected but tucked in there are the amazingly wonderful, too. That is when I realized the only control I have over any of this is how I chose to experience them! I realized that I could understand, celebrate can survive even better when I could express these feelings with my own words of courage, humor, and grace. I am the Queen of my own life and the choice is mine!

I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure.

I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"


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Wednesday, February 25, 2015

If they only knew!

Orlando Weekly- 88 Most Amazing Photos
from Nude Nite 2015


......and what most do not know and will never know, is that part way through this piece I received my latest report from the cardiologist.  It said I was quite possibly in an emotional state of denial, in stage 3 heart failure, non-compliant, a poor historian and I need to have an ICD surgically implanted in my chest.  I tore it up and implanted it in the chest of my painting.  The work sold on the first night and was listed as one of the 88 most amazing photos in the Orlando Weekly.
REALLY...they do not think I emotionally understand what is happening to me?
If they only knew!

 
"Arms Around my Life"  Janis Ian

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