life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....

I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this raunchy disease. My words always help me understand that in this life there will be times that are crappy painful and unexpected but tucked in there are the amazingly wonderful, too. That is when I realized the only control I have over any of this is how I chose to experience them! I realized that I could understand, celebrate can survive even better when I could express these feelings with my own words of courage, humor, and grace. I am the Queen of my own life and the choice is mine!

I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure.

I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"


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Monday, January 13, 2014

I Crave a Different Kind of Buzz


My question is just how many times or how badly do I have to be broken before I get to be whole. I mean really really whole.  And what the hell defines a whole person, anyway?  I suspect “whole” is a fairy tale.  One of those happy platitudes we all bow to and never achieve.  I promise, there has never been a time, at any point of my life, that I willing let myself be broken.  I went down kicking and screaming every single time.  Why can’t I be broken and whole at the same time?  I want a different kind of buzz…Let me live that fantasy.
                       
 "Royals" Lorde

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