life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this disease, open heart surgery that was less than successful and more recently an S-ICD (internal cardiac defibrillator) implanted in my chest that will hopefully restore my heart beat in case of sudden cardiac death. I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to learn how to live a full life with heart failure, to honor my creativity, and to explore all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say
"Don't talk like that!"


Music is loading really slow lately...sorry...

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Elusive Passion

My adult life has included the respectable roles of daughter, wife, mother, grandmother. Each role had well-defined tasks that were judged by how well I took care of others. If they gave grades, I suspect I would pass.

However, if my life is graded by how well I took care of me, I fail.

When I was afraid, I hid in the roles I knew I could pass.

I am searching for a new role.

I am searching for the life and passion that comes from knowing why I am here. The passion that explodes with the energy I so desperately need.

Art has given me a glimpse of elusive passion. I know it exists!

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