life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure. I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"


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Saturday, May 11, 2019

After she lets go....

I will not lie….my Mother and I had a turbulent relationship!  Life choices that we both made created a difficult, if not impossible Mother-Daughter relationship to develop.  But then there was another element that entered into the difficulties…we both had preconceived notions about how and what a Mother-Daughter relationship should be.  Without the emotional tools to develop our own unconventional relationship, we both depended on an unrealistic version of a combination of a religious Madonna and “Leave it to Beaver” definition.  It was an impossible task to live up to and we both failed miserably.  When we finally were able to admit to ourselves and each other that we were truly inept at this Mother-Daughter thing we were able to forgive and forget and move into an adult friendship that we could define on our own terms.  It was not perfect but, oh my it was so much better.  Letting go of other people’s expectations allowed us to enjoy each other as fallible adults, more than I suspect most typical Mother-Daughter relationships are capable of.  The friendship was amazing but I will confess it is the Mother hugs that truly live on in my heart and give me such strength.  Here's to you Mother....your favorite!
"Take Five" Dave Brubeck

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