life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this disease, open heart surgery that was less than successful and more recently an S-ICD (internal cardiac defibrillator) implanted in my chest that will hopefully restore my heart beat in case of sudden cardiac death. I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to learn how to live a full life with heart failure, to honor my creativity, and to explore all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say
"Don't talk like that!"


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Sunday, August 27, 2017

Shine on!

Whoa…that one jumped out and bit me on the ass! It does happen, with or without my permission.  But, I guess the opposite might have to be considered the same way.  If I chase exhilarations and allow that to define me, I may be setting myself up for chronic failure and perhaps an identity that is just as damaging. Somewhere between struggle and exhilaration is the balance.  But I have to wonder if the if the profound struggles do not magnify the intensity of the magnificent exhilarations…and is it a good thing or a bad thing?  As I look at my last Artist’s Way class and taking down this last exhibition there is an overwhelming feeling of both loss and accomplishment and the fear of an overpowering life change!  I find this feeling of nagging unrest grabbing me as I let go of this part of my life that has defined me for such a long time. Time to move on to the next chapter, find the balance…maybe it is the struggle that pushes me forward....on to the exhilaration? Maybe it is just time to easily and effortlessly move forward, no big splashes just time to shine on!
"Shine On"  Eric Bibb

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