life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....

I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this raunchy disease. My words always help me understand that in this life there will be times that are crappy painful and unexpected but tucked in there are the amazingly wonderful, too. That is when I realized the only control I have over any of this is how I chose to experience them! I realized that I could understand, celebrate can survive even better when I could express these feelings with my own words of courage, humor, and grace. I am the Queen of my own life and the choice is mine!

I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure.

I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"



Monday, March 7, 2016

Never settle for the ordinary.....

I can remember, as a child being taught not to stand out, to strive to not be seen.  To conform, fit in, not make waves, don’t be difficult, and do not draw attention to yourself.  No one and I do mean no one ever asked me what I wanted to do with my life.  They never encouraged my talent.  I followed all of the rules, married, had children, went to church, volunteered, chaperoned, worked hard and waited almost an entire lifetime for someone to wave the magic wand that would make me happy and successful.  In the meantime I continued to not stand out, not be seen, conform, fit in before I finally realized it was a lie.  A lie not intended to specifically damage me, but to make me, my parents, siblings, spouse and children look better in the eyes of other people.  And in that horrible process, I did t exactly the same thing that was done to me to my own children.

I want them all to know how sorry I am, I wish I had known better!  Please please please….never settle for the ordinary…live your life, celebrate the unusual!

"Have a Little Faith"  Micheal Franti

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