life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....

I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this raunchy disease. My words always help me understand that in this life there will be times that are crappy painful and unexpected but tucked in there are the amazingly wonderful, too. That is when I realized the only control I have over any of this is how I chose to experience them! I realized that I could understand, celebrate can survive even better when I could express these feelings with my own words of courage, humor, and grace. I am the Queen of my own life and the choice is mine!

I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure.

I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"



Sunday, March 20, 2016

Cannot undo me

Why do I let them define me?  
Why do I deny my own needs so they are comfortable, happy, and not angry? 
Why do I allow them? 
It is the time to turn my own finger around and point back at me…
The more I love and need, the more power I give them… I was taught  that if I  loved hard enough, did everything they wanted me to, and did not question,....they would love me...It does not work; I am not loved in the way I….the way I want to be loved. I am not ungrateful for the love I have and  I am not blaming them,   I am blaming me, maybe I have to come undone first before I can put together the strength, love and life I want. One day will not be able to undo me.

"32 Flavors"  Ani DiFranco

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