life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this disease, open heart surgery that was less than successful and more recently an S-ICD (internal cardiac defibrillator) implanted in my chest that will hopefully restore my heart beat in case of sudden cardiac death. I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to learn how to live a full life with heart failure, to honor my creativity, and to explore all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say
"Don't talk like that!"


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Music is loading really slow lately...sorry...

Friday, July 30, 2010

Road Signs

I believe the understanding that brings me peace will not mysteriously appear out of thin air. My peace will not come from doctors, pastors or the people I love so dearly, although that is how I thought it should be.

I am learning that the fear and grief I have been struggling so hard to avoid are in fact the road signs that promise I am heading in the right emotional direction. The route to the peace passes through fear and grief.

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