life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....

I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this raunchy disease. My words always help me understand that in this life there will be times that are crappy painful and unexpected but tucked in there are the amazingly wonderful, too. That is when I realized the only control I have over any of this is how I chose to experience them! I realized that I could understand, celebrate can survive even better when I could express these feelings with my own words of courage, humor, and grace. I am the Queen of my own life and the choice is mine!

I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure.

I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"


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Friday, December 26, 2014

Very Very Real

"Confronting Congestive Heart Failure, 
Putting a Positive Spin on Fighting CHF"
That is the group I belong to. The first support group I have really been a part of.  I have joined others, but after a few days or meetings, it was clear that they were big fat whiners. Almost like a stupid competition of who had the biggest scars, took the most medicine, or had the worst doctor.  Nothing could have been more depressing or unproductive.  I have avoided them like the plague, until this group.  They are real, there are real discussions, questions and answers, for the most part they are all incredibly brave and positive about life, committed to not letting this disease consume their lives and very insightful.  I have only been a member for a couple of months,but this week we lost a group member.  He died, he died of heart failure. I have known for quite some time I will die of this, this week it became very, very real and sometimes I am very scared.
"Road of the Heart"  Ann Reed      
when something happens to me, 
they should be told, they would want to know  
             

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