life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this disease, open heart surgery that was less than successful and more recently an S-ICD (internal cardiac defibrillator) implanted in my chest that will hopefully restore my heart beat in case of sudden cardiac death. I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to learn how to live a full life with heart failure, to honor my creativity, and to explore all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say
"Don't talk like that!"


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Music is loading really slow lately...sorry...

Thursday, December 18, 2014

on the other side

Creativity is my God/prayer. You may not understand it, and that is is just fine, because I do not understand it either.
I do not think any of us are capable of truly experiencing God on this side of the grave. Humans have been trying to do that since the beginning of time and we are no closer to an explanation than we were thousands of years ago, infact we are still telling the very same stories. I think we all get little glimpses of what God might be but none of my glimpses match what I have been told about this God or other Gods.
So, I will wait. I know in my heart that all of this will be lovingly revealed to me on the other side of the grave, after I release this life, the emotions and all of the limitations of living. For right now, I will happily practice creativity, that is where my little glimpses are.

"Phenomenal Woman"  Ruthie Foster

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