I am sick of reality! All I really want to do is not pay attention to what my heart is or is not doing. I am convinced that it will do what it will do, and fretting and focusing on what is going on in there only wastes my energy and steals my time. But tomorrow I will have to pay attention and focus on what they tell me, tomorrow I find out what is going on in there and what we are going to do….or not do...and I am scared. The less I think about it, the better, healthier, and happier I am. But tomorrow for just a little while I have to look reality right in the face and deal with it. Where the hell is my fairy godmother?
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