life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....

I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this raunchy disease. My words always help me understand that in this life there will be times that are crappy painful and unexpected but tucked in there are the amazingly wonderful, too. That is when I realized the only control I have over any of this is how I chose to experience them! I realized that I could understand, celebrate can survive even better when I could express these feelings with my own words of courage, humor, and grace. I am the Queen of my own life and the choice is mine!

I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure.

I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"



Monday, November 19, 2012

Fire Up the Keg-er-ator, Here Comes Your Momma and the Green Bean Casserole!

Holy CRAP!!!
It is that time of year already and there is a wiff of turkey in the air.  I am lacing up my “go” shoes and getting ready to head out of here.   Last year the official Evan’s Thanksgiving was delightfully non-traditional. We celebrated on Wednesday, the night before, at the Outback Steak House, a thick cut medium rare steak and lots and lots of beer = a full tummy and a nice buzz! .  No cooking, no cleaning, no leftovers.   The PERFECT THANKSGIVING!

I was not always this cynical, there were many many many years that I spent the entire Thanksgiving day in my tiny little kitchen, messing up every pot, pan and dish we owned, producing a semi-perfect Thanksgiving dinner for what felt like a cast of thousands. Then washing all those pots and pans and dishes, and cramming tons of leftovers into an already overwhelmed refrigerator.  I can appreciate the first Thanksgiving story, but have never really understood how that story translates into me wedged in a tiny kitchen all day and night, performing unspeakable heinous acts of cooking....Damn you Pilgrims! 

My version of "Over the River and Through the Woods" is heading up I-75 to Gainesville to spend T-day with my sons, and all of my grandsons (that is all 4 of my little guys), 3 of my best big guys and a smoked turkey with all the trimmings (cooked by #1 son and his awesome wife).  Yes, it will be a very traditional Thanksgiving day, which has not been my style lately, but there will be beer! 
Let me see...No cooking, no cleaning, no leftovers (for me anyway) a full tummy and a nice buzz....hmmmmm- this will fit nicely into my current idea of the perfect Thanksgiving! 

Fire up the keg-er-ator, Jason, here comes your Momma and the green bean casserole!


  1. That's something to be THANKFUL for!!!

  2. I am INCREDIBLY thankful!!! For a loving family, for phenomenal friends, for my kick-butt heart and a most marvelous creative life!