life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure. I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"


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Monday, May 27, 2024

Starting Over


 Starting over (and over, and over).  Clearly something I do not do well, and I find myself here again.  In the past few years, I have had to start over as a single person, then when that did not go well, well let's be honest I failed miserably.  I ended up in the memory care unit and kept significantly medicated to function at the lowest level of surviving.  After 8 months in the memory care unit, I graduated to the assisted living section.  That means I got to move into a one-bedroom apartment with a small kitchenette (no stove or anything that might start a fire and windows that are sealed shut) And if this was not the bottom of the barrel, I had to sell my only home of 45 years to live in a place that I do not feel like I belong.  I have tried to fit in and even found a friend (or more than a friend) to hang out with.  Someone that understood what I have survived.  Now I find that I have failed at that too. Not sure if I even want to start over again, but it seems I have no choice... so here I go starting over again with no idea where I will end up this time.