life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this disease, open heart surgery that was less than successful and more recently an S-ICD (internal cardiac defibrillator) implanted in my chest that will hopefully restore my heart beat in case of sudden cardiac death. I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to learn how to live a full life with heart failure, to honor my creativity, and to explore all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say
"Don't talk like that!"


Music is loading really slow lately...sorry...

Monday, September 17, 2012


Some gifts come in boxes covered in pretty paper and tied in ribbon. They are fun and easily recognized but the gifts that life delivers are not always so easy to identify. Sometimes gifts are life lessons that come packaged in fear, heartache and hurt. But they are gifts nonetheless. I have to wade through the grief, before these situations reveal their rewards and point out what is important, where my power is, how to be strong, what to let go of, what to hang on to and how to move through difficult situations with strength and grace.

I am beginning to recognize all of the gifts and lessons I am receiving and I am learning to accept what comes next with dignity, strength and grace. I still have a long, long way to go.

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