life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this disease, open heart surgery that was less than successful and more recently an S-ICD (internal cardiac defibrillator) implanted in my chest that will hopefully restore my heart beat in case of sudden cardiac death. I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to learn how to live a full life with heart failure, to honor my creativity, and to explore all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say
"Don't talk like that!"


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Thursday, September 1, 2011

Unexpectedly Weird

Unexpectedly weird is being blindsided by an emotion I never saw coming. Today I got one of those awesome “parking passes” you know the one? The blue tags that hang from the rear view mirror and let me park close to the grocery store door. Those are the parking spaces I have coveted all of my life, so I thought I would be absolutely ecstatic, finally I get the good spots!

The lady at the tag office pushes the parking pass across the counter, I loose my breath and all I can see is those huge horrible big white letters screaming at me (disabled). No grouping of letters has ever been this unexpectedly offensive to me.

Hoping the primo parking spaces will make up for nasty label I feel like I am now wearing.

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