life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....

I write to expose and work through the ugly parts of this raunchy disease. My words always help me understand that in this life there will be times that are crappy painful and unexpected but tucked in there are the amazingly wonderful, too. That is when I realized the only control I have over any of this is how I chose to experience them! I realized that I could understand, celebrate can survive even better when I could express these feelings with my own words of courage, humor, and grace. I am the Queen of my own life and the choice is mine!

I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure.

I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"



Monday, January 24, 2011

I Do Not Know What That Is

Desperately searching for all the things I want to accomplish, while I still can, I have learned that I have no idea what I am doing. There never have been any long-term directions or distinguishing themes to my life. I always managed to rise to the typical expectations, but nothing more.

I am feeling desperate to achieve that marvelous life that will fulfill me.
I am feeling more overwhelmed and worthless than I have ever been.

How do I be everything I want to be, even when I do not know what that is?

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