It is Christmas morning…after the cinnamon buns are done, I
will be going to Darren’s to see what Santa brought. Last night as I sat on the porch with my
vodka and tonic, as I do every night the tears began rolling as I realized it
was the first time in 46 years he has not been here for Christmas Eve, then it
dawned on me it was the first time EVER I have been alone on Christmas Eve. Memories
began flooding back, the Christmases’ we did not have the money for much of
anything and we built a toy box, painted old second-hand school desks. Then came the nights we spent until dawn
assembling. There were the “Go” Christmases, big wheels, bicycles, and
skateboards. I swear when I woke up this
morning I could hear from a distance the squealing of 2 little boys…”He’s been
here-he’s been here!” I suspect I have had more happy Christmas memories than
most people will have in a lifetime. I
am grateful beyond measure, but the hole in my heart and life is still overwhelming at times. I love and miss you!
"All I want for Christmas is You" Micheal Buble
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