life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure. I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"


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Saturday, February 8, 2020

Perhaps some of this guilt is just I am not that tame....


I am eternally grateful to all that have offered their love, sympathy, advice, and concern. But, I have felt like there must be something horribly wrong with me that this incredible outpouring of love and support did not help me get through the grief.  The guilt and the emotional self-flagellation began when I could not feel better, I thought love could fix anything….everything!

It now occurs to me, that I have never been the regular one.  I have done in life all that was expected of me, but it felt like it was more of a struggle for me than most.  My life stretched out, reveled in the creative, admired the different, and celebrated all that succeeded beyond normal.  I do truly appreciate all of the love I have received, but perhaps some of this guilt is just I am not that tame!


"Unwritten" Natasha Beddingfield

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