life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

life, love,art. heart failure and assorted ramblings

Don't Talk Like That...

I write to find out what my heart thinks....
I am here to celebrate my life, to uncover my fears, to hold on to love, to grieve my losses, to laugh long and hard, and to learn how to live a full magnificent life with heart failure. I am honoring my creativity, and exploring all of my emotions out loud ...before anyone can say....."Don't talk like that!"


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Monday, January 6, 2020

5 Months and a Monday


5 Months and a Monday, back to back.  It still hurts like hell, but it a different kind of hurt.  I wish I had better words for this.  In the beginning, I did not want to go on without him, I could not imagine how that could possibly happen.  Now I know I do not have a choice (some of that comes with some serious medication) but I take it…I am not so tough and brave any more….It is just a different kind of pain…

"The Fault in Our Stars" Troye Sivan

"Laughing while still feeling sad is perfectly normal in grief. We’ve got this idea that there are only two options in grief: broken or healed. It doesn’t seem to matter that nothing else in life is like that. Somehow, when it comes to grief, the entire breadth of human experience goes out the window. There’s this whole middle ground between those two extremes (as there is for everything else in life), but we don’t know how to talk about it.

You can have a big deep sadness and find something utterly hilarious, all at the same time. This is the coolness of being human, we don't have to choose just one thing. We can hold many emotions at once."
  ~Megan Devine

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