Next to the last first....

This first year is not over yet but what it is full of is “firsts without you” Halloween, Thanksgiving,  45th wedding anniversary, Christmas, New year’s, Valentine's, and the list goes on.  Each one is like another stab through my heart, but each one I survive.  As your 69^th birthday arrives, I realize this may be the “last FIRST” until the anniversary of your death in Aug.

From then on, my heart will know what to expect, it will no longer be an overwhelming and debilitating  loss of emotional control but it will always be the source of memories and love and loss.

" I will"  Ben Taylor