There are days that I adore the company, but still, I am working through
a lot of day to day life without him. I want to believe that I am
strong and am doing well, it is what I think everyone wants to see, too. But, the process is not fast or easy and it seems
to need to be done alone. It appears that no one can help me through it, truly it is a one-person
undertaking. There are still emotional “triggers”
that I am unaware of, that literally will overtake me without my
permission. They are always shocking and
overwhelming. Everything from a simple
non-descript sound or smell. This morning
it was the feel and warmth of wrapping the soft wool shawl around my shoulders
that he got for me last Christmas before going out to the porch for our coffee.
"The Way We Were" Barbara Streisand
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