Last week out of a sheer need to move…to not sit and stew in
grief…I began cleaning the studio. Instead
of the relief I was looking for I found that every box and shelf I went through
held evidence of my old life, a life I have been unable to let go
of. Not willing to confront my physical abilities, and my emotional inability to admit to myself that this part
of my life is over I have hung on to stuff.
I have tried to convince myself that the day is coming that I will be
able to function like I used to, that I will be able to take my old life
back. I CAN’T. The past is gone and I cannot move into what
the next part of my life holds for me until I let go. Until I am able to let go
of all of the stuff both good and bad from my past I will not be able to move
forward. So much harder than I thought it would be.
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