Wednesday, December 11, 2019

HELP-ER vs HELP-EE


The most heinous part of losing a loved one are the sneak attacks of overwhelming uncontrollable grief.  I understand that grieving people call them “triggers” and they can be anything! They are brought on by a situation, a memory, a smell, a song, food, a photograph, a grocery store...it can be absolutely any ridiculous thing known or unknown! And that is precisely why they are so unavoidable and overwhelming.  I am learning how to “check-in” with myself, especially after or during a trigger, figuring out what it was, how to avoid it or at the very least acknowledge that there is one coming and prepare myself.

I am now wondering if I can activate that same “check-in” when there is something that helps, creates a giggle, makes me feel better.  Yesterday I got to help. It was as simple as helping my son drop off and pick up his car for some work.  Yesterday I got to be the HELPER …NOT the HELP-EE…and it really felt good!
"Have a Little Faith in Me" Michael Franti

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