Tuesday, November 19, 2019

Muddy Waters


Sometimes I find social interaction exhausting. The effort to join the world again is Herculean and monumental. Those densely scattered grief land mines are hard to face and they jump out at me from everywhere. I watch myself shrink my world down by, refusing invitations to just about anything and everything.  By controlling the size of my world, I keep myself safe. More than 40 years of my life are right here in this little house.  The love, the fights, the children all of those memories are right here. As outgoing as I have always been, I find that I need a lot more time alone and quiet than ever before waiting for the muddy water to clear.

"Alone Again"  Gilbert O'Sullivan

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